US DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE IS TESTING WATERING CROPS WITH MOUNTAIN DEW VIA AI POWERED DRONES

“After throrough research, we have found that sprinkling certain crops in moderation with Mountain Dew increasing crop yields by approximately 67% per quarter. We are now moving to a full phase implementation and roll out of the initiative which will be facilitated via a fleet of AI powered drones, that will monitor and irrigate the crops with Mountain Dew. We will be using the classic Mountain Dew flavor on majority of the commonly produced crops and Mountain Dew Code Red on any crops which may begin failing as a result of being under-irrigated by the classic flavor. Mountain Dew’s got what the plants crave. It’s got electrolytes!” - statement by Head of US Department of Agriculture, interview by FUX NEWS