TRUMP CHANGES AI’S NAME TO AMERICAN INTELLIGENCE (AI) AT UNITED NATIONS

NEW YORK — President Donald Trump reportedly announced a bold rebranding initiative at the United Nations Tuesday, declaring that “Artificial Intelligence” would henceforth be known as “American Intelligence.”

“Why should it be artificial?” Trump reportedly asked. “America has plenty of intelligence. Some of it is even working.”

Trump said the name change would immediately apply to ChatGPT, self-driving cars, and every government computer that still runs Windows XP.

UN officials appeared confused by the announcement, particularly after Trump allegedly demanded that AI systems “start giving America credit for inventing intelligence.”

“We're still trying to determine what this means,” said one exhausted U.N. official. “But apparently the new logo will be an eagle holding a microchip.”

Trump concluded by promising that American Intelligence would be “the smartest intelligence in the world—maybe even smarter than the people who programmed it.”

(FUX NEWS is a satirical news publication by @mr_m0nch)