"FART STARTS MASSIVE WILD-FIRE"

 "WE DIDNT START THE FIRE, IT WAS ALWAYS BURNING SINCE THE WORLD WAS TURNING" the Florida man was heard drunkenly singing out of key as he was escorted to the police cruiser. The arresting officer was available for comment, stating the suspect was easily tracked down to his residence after posting a viral video on social media where he lit a dry tree on fire by holding a lighter to his butt and farting.

His date who looked extremely impressed in the video was not available for comment.

-FUX NEWS